Monday, August 30, 2004

wow...haven't been blogging for such a long time...

so many things have happened..wonder where i should start...

school's been getting a lil' better..thankfully... getting adjusted to the rhythm of university life and hostel life. university is where there's zero spoonfeeding... much to my dismay.. =) university is also where every single day i'm making new friends...really... i have many many names and faces and msn nicks to remember. university is where i really start to treasure my friends and not take them for granted. it's no longer when in JC you by default have lunch and go for morning breaks with your CG pals. hostel life's been good. played inter-block games..darts (ah! learnt a new 'sport'..quite interesting) volleyball. badminton, netball...that's the exercise i'm getting these days...in addition to all the walking i do around school...

CCA's picking up speed...went to Singapore Boys' Hostel/Home for an induction talk... hopefully i can talk some sense into those boys... =) my subcomm is starting work too...our first project is coming up in less than 5 weeks... i'm appointed financial controller cum chief group leader... more work!! was comtemplating if i should quit my other subcomm (which is publicity and publications) IF i do get into union orientation camp main comm as secretary. have to wait till friday....

brings me to question if i can handle everything + my obligation to get a B for every single module i'm taking...thanks to my dear scholarship... time to say goodbye (to one committment?)...

singapore idol's getting so fun!! everyone i know like david yeo a lot! and i have a sneaky feeling he's a claydawg! (claydawg=male clay fan) he's not as good as clay of course...but if he's singapore's answer to clay..i'm happy! he's a good christian, with such a bubbly personality and easygoing..and so funny! he sings like clay (did a song done by clay too...open arms..exact rendition no less...) he 'dances' like clay...he has humility..like clay. i'm keeping my eyes out for dwayne tan too...think his voice resembles clay more..musical/broadway style... and benjamin eio...he's so cute.. =)

the olympic flame has been ignited and diminished. 17 days of highs and lows. of hopes and disappointment. i really applaud xueling, ronald and jiawei for so bravely shouldering a nation's hopes, dreams and expectations of getting a medal and still managed to come out of it a stronger person and a better athlete. it's ok. we'll just try again in beijing...don't fret singapore... =) we're good at other areas...the olympics isn't everything... and we shouldn't blame anyone for our medal drought...and don't stress our athletes so much! it's so silly... if i were to blame anyone, i blame it on that irritating super noisy north korean who played against jiawei in the semis. she irritated me to the CORE.... was SO happy when the china girl yining (i think) trashed her 4 sets to nil! anyway..it's very nice to see all the nations of the world coming together in the name of sports and records. challenging our own limits...living in one area harmoniously...

teacher's day's coming!! was just reminded at how much i missed my tutors in tj...though i still see teacher chen kee in church every sat...and talk to mr. cheng quite often on msn... well to all teachers out there...take care of yourselves and thank you! =)

bethany celebrated 31 years of service to the Lord and 16 years of missions work last saturday with a special service and dinner at swissotel the stamford.

that's baby justin, teacher chiew yen and me! he's such a baby... =) makes me feel like pinching his cute cheeks...
it was such great joy to be able to fellowship together with the whole church and be still in God's presence and just thank Him for all that He has done. it is evident from the people, from the atmosphere, from the message of God's love, from the food, from the items by the senior choir, youth choir, children, handbells and guitar ensemble..that God's love has touched each and every heart in that room and has radiated out from within. it is so comforting to know that He loves all of us, and He loves me so much, even though sometimes i turn my back on Him, sometimes i can't hear His words and i can't feel His hand leading me...He still loves me all the same...

so many things. so many choices. so many detours. so many crossroads. so much emotions.

"I will say of the Lord, 'He is my refuge and my fortress; My God, in Him I will trust.'" Psalm 91:2

God is always there. =)

This girl posted at 10:54 PM

Wednesday, August 18, 2004

so many people have asked me how has school been.... i can't even count... hmm..that means i have so many people who care about me... =)

anyway school's been summarised into 2 words - traumatising and interesting.

why traumatising...

no prizes for guessing my horrid biophysical chem module driving me nuts... it's still driving me nuts...and it's gonna drive me nuts for the next half of the year... hey scramble the letters NTU and you get NUT!! oh and organic chem is more high level now...today had lab...looked at E.coli, yeast and human white blood cells ....histology nightmare all over again....had to draw too! yikes...

why interesting....

made many new friends from many places -all over singapore and all over asia. plus this caucasian girl who lives on my floor 4 rooms away.... and a clay aiken lookalike!!! which i haven't got to know yet.....and i haven't even seen him! fellow claymate in NTU saw him and literally was stunned...cos he looks so much like clay... for those who i seldom get to talk to...clay actually looks very good now...go look at my photos if you don't believe.. =) oh to sidetrack...i uploaded photos from my union orientation camp... just one afternoon's...waiting for seniors to get the photos sorted...taking a long time....

also had many stuff going on...fellow floor-mate organised a little gathering... there was hall BBQ...joined NTU's welfare services club (tj's LEO club thingy) to do something better with my time... working with youth, and got into subcomm for volunteer management and pending for publicity and publications subcomm...

hostel life is not too bad...i've heard people on the 2 ends of the spectrum. some hate it...say it's boring and bland...some love it to bits. i guess like all things..it depends on the person.

oh yah~ i got my ibook!! and i LOVE it to bits!!! it's the coolest thing on earth..the Mac....and no it's not incompatible at all...in fact the Mac versions of icq msn IE etc are SO sleek! it's super easy to get use to it....at least for me...and u get to be the balance computer user...able to switch from Mac to PC with ease... =) and many thanks to my dear sister who got me hooked on Mac...but i still use PC too....at home...

right now i'm also SO glad to go church on saturdays...at the end of a long week in school...after much toil and sorrow... =) daily devotional times and prayer keeps me going but going back to the Lord's house renews my strength and reminds me so vividly why i'm going through school, why i'm studying and what happens after all these madness. why i must persevere and strive and work hard and play hard in school..and to be thankful each day for what i have..when at home to treasure the time i have with my family....

was watching episodes of sex and the city... one is where carrie ponders about the term 'soulmate'. what's the first thing that goes through your mind when you think about 'soulmate'? for a swinging and happy single girl like me...it's hard to make sense of the word soulmate...especially when you don't think you have found him/her.... must your soulmate be a member of the opposite sex? must you marry him/her? or is he/she your best friend? the dictionary defines the term as

someone who you have a special relationship with because you share the same feelings, attitudes and beliefs.

then i think about how many soulmates is each of us entitled to have? in an ideal situation of course we would want our spouse to be our soulmate...and probably our best friend too. if you never find them, does that mean your life isn't complete because there's no one to share the same thoughts as you? or does it not matter at all. because non-soulmate friends of ours are enough already? ultimately it's an amazing feeling to have someone that shares your thoughts, your hopes, your ideas and whom you can get along with so well. those who find theirs are really lucky. in the case of the girls on SATC, they become each other's soulmates and the men that come along will just be men...which i think it's a comforting thought.

so the puzzling thing about soulmates? i'll get back to this when i've found mine...

This girl posted at 11:51 PM

Saturday, August 07, 2004

school has started for real...

my biophysical chemistry module is freaking me out. i have NO idea what's going on half the time. my lecturer's a swedish..bad...my tutor for that module is a french..he's not bad..but the content is just plain nasty... sigh~ who cares about schrodinger's equation? i took biological sciences to escape physics...but guess what...i'm doing practically every a-level subject that i'm sitting for...physics, chemistry, biology and math! cos the equation involves differential eqns, integration and differentiation.

on a lighter note..that french guy has such a nice sense of dressing! haha~ you know guys where they wear a button down shirt tucked out (clay's signature!) and roll up their sleeves casually...very nice! very un-prof like... but i like... =) maybe that's why i couldn't understand him..cos i wasn't paying attention..haha~

other than that..school's been ok. climb a hill to get to school everyday...eat lunch with different people..sometimes with my coursemates, sometimes with my union camp OG-mates. went to eat supper with some seniors from union camp... it was weird at first cos i was the only freshie there among 7 of us, and i only knew 2 of them. one's my block-mate...we live on the same floor and she's sherwe's gd friend...and sherwe.... but after a while worked my social skills...and it got much better cos i found out about school, the inside info on union camp (cos they were all in the main comm) and made friends.... went with melody to eat at chinatown...then shopped at the city hall area.... today went to eat with my councillors and catch up with them...then yesterday went to eat dinner with tr. chen kee, mr. cheng, louisa, denise, jiahui and yee lin...basically tr. chen kee treated us for helping her out with the science fair stuff during our teaching days. it was nice to get the dose of tr. chen kee's absolute lameness..oo and mr. cheng's too... i'm so glad and thankful for the both of them...and having kept in contact with them and them still being so concerned about us and our lives. a stark contrast to my current tutors in university....

ok..mustn't play so much...study!! or else everything's downhill from here.

it's been a long week...and i was so glad to be home...getting a little homesick...missed having dinners cooked for me at home... missed my computer with my msn, net access and of course clay-related media... so it's good that now i treasure time spent with my family so much more...learn not to take my parents for granted. and learn to take care of myself.

it's been a weird week too..with ups and middles and downs...and i was also so thankful to be able to go back to the Lord's house today and to worship Him. so glad i can depend on Him and can go to Him in prayer whatever happens, and He will be there to take my hand. all the struggles i go through in this week, especially in my academic work... i just know He is there to help me through.

I Will Carry You - Clay Aiken
Measure of a Man

Yeah, I know it hurts
Yeah, I know you're scared
Walkin' downThe road that leads
To Who-Knows-Where

Dont'cha hang your head
Dont'cha give up yet
When courage starts to
will be right here

When your world breaks down
And the voices tell you,"Turn around"
When your dreams give out
I will carry you, carry you
When the stars go blind
And the darkness starts to flood your eyes
When you're fallin' behind
I will carry you

Everybody cries
Everybody bleeds
No one ever said that life's an easy thing
That's the beauty of when you lose your way
Close your eyes and go to sleep
Wake up to another day

When your world breaks down
And the voices tell you,"Turn around"
When your dreams give out
I will carry you, carry you
When the stars go blind
And the darkness starts to flood your eyes
When you've fallen behind
I will carry you

You should know now that you're not alone
Take my heart and we will find
You will find your way ho-ome

When the stars go blind
And the darkness starts to flood your eyes
When you've fallen behind
I will carry you, carry you
I will carry you, carry you

again..this is a Clay song...but you can take 'I' as God...who will carry you whatever happens. carry me... =)

This girl posted at 11:54 PM